Tactile Island

Tactile Island: Blind with a Voice

A Conversation with Hiroki Kubo [HK]
Musician, composer, teacher and writer from Nagoya.
July 7, 2006 in Kyoto.
By Yuka and Markuz Wernli Saitô.

What is the hardest thing of being deprived of any sight?
HK: That's the most difficult question. Probably in my case it is difficult to go to a place new to me on my own, I have to ask someone. In addition, beating mosquitos became clearly harder than before...

What are easy and more difficult places to get around?
Hiroki Kubo

Conversation with Hiroki Kubo, musician and English teacher

HK: Restaurant or store which are new to me are difficult. I ask just around the store I ask someone where the front desk is and ask for a clerk to get something for me. Usually the staff is helpful but I cannot see what's around so I can just ask for what I need, I don't know what's available. There is no room to ask for trivial things. But in my case when I could see I didn't like shopping anyway...so it doesn't matter now. For example I like music though, so when I was a teenager I would go to the record store staying there for one minute or so just to get my desired CD and leave right away... Now it is quiet similar for me. In addition, a station is sometimes hard to walk because it has a lot of braille plate on the floor. Too much braille plates make me confused in a way.

How do you buy music these days?
HK: Recently I don't buy CDs. I get the MP3 files from the internet. I find out about music through radio. In Nagoya there are three FM radio stations. FMA, ZIP-FM and RADIO-i. ZIP-FM and RADIO-i have more variety regardless of western or Japanese music they broadcast it. Some music is not so popular but there are just good songs and upcoming tunes.

Music is an important part of your life. Was it always so important?
HK: Actually not really. I would always listen to music but playing music. (Last year, I started to play music again for the first time in seven years. It means I had not played music between 1998 and 2005)

Did you start playing music after you got blind?
HK: Komuro Tetsuya is a keyboard player like Keith Emerson. When I was ten years old I saw Komuro on TV and thought that I wanted to be like him. Playing keyboard is so cool. It's fascinating. At that time I just aspired to Komuro's image and behavior, not the music itself. Just imitated him and wanted to be as cool as him. I got my first keyboard when I was 15 years old. But I just put on the music program on the synthesizer. So I didn't play and just used the keys. When I was a teenager I liked drawing pictures more than music. So I illustrated entertainer's face or something. After I became blind drawing became difficult, right. Of course I could draw in blindness but I cannot see my pictures. So I gave up and started making music similar to drawing a picture.

How can you compare music and drawing?
HK: A song has lyrics, right? So I can make a scenery with lyrics or so — painting with words. And the melody can work as coloring or something. So that's why I named my band 'Sketchbook'. The members are just a vocalist and me. I met him at the school for the blind, he has reduced vision. The image I use is that the vocalist is like a pencil ? drawing a picture through lyrics ? and the piano is like a sketchbook. I want to make songs more simple just with a vocal and a piano. We call our concert a sketch. Always we sketch something. We don't do improvisations but every time we play the same song differently because the audience is different, right. And the energy we get is changing. So every concert has a different atmosphere.

How do your songs come into being?
HK: Actually I don't feel like I am making or composing songs, they just pop up to my mind. My working style is that first a song title comes up. For example the title "IIWAKe(excuse)". The title makes way to the lyrics which follow afterwards. The whole song I make by myself. The title is first and the words come in afterwards through humming. Usually 30 minutes after the title came up the entire song is completed. The vocalist is altering the song naturally while we're practicing. Sometimes the melody should be changed to make it easier for the vocalist to sing. We don't have discussions about that, it just evolves naturally. The vocalist's name is Takashi.

I believe that your band is quiet successful...
HK: Our song is entered in a contest and if we catch the first prize it would be an exciting thing. We will play in front of an audience who is the jury... We will play our song in two different contests. In August in Nara Bunka-kaikan and the Tokyo Kokusai Forum is in October. Both concert hall accommodate 1300 people. Eight years ago, Takashi and I belonged to a music club at the Nagoya school for the blind and we were invited to the Nishiharu-cho concert in Aichi prefecture. We played our songs there in front of 1000 people. The big concert hall is quiet different from the live house. In the live house the audience is near to us. We can feel their energy and reaction but in the big hall the stage is like in another world. It's like a flying spaceship over everything. I like both of them in their own way. It gives us different feelings but the live house is more captivating. Because the audience is closer. In the big hall we can feel more separated so it doesn't make us so nervous, just pure performing and playing. As for the sound of course the big hall is better. The feeling is great.

How do you describe your music?
HK: Indies music (Indies means underground and amateur in Japanese) I would say. Here I have a CD for your with our songs on it.

Have you ever played a real piano?
HK: In the next concert I can use an expensive grand piano. It's like a different instrument. The touch and the keys are not that different but the acoustics of the piano is more sensitive. So I can apply my fingers with a soft touch. I also tried to play the guitar. This recording [you're hearing now] was taken just three months after we started. So now we play the song differently. The current version's quality is better now and different from the original version.

What cues do you use to play music together?
HK: The feeling for timing between me an the vocalist is similar. Without verbal communication we can play together. In our case eye contact is not a strategy. Actually I set up a different acoustic unit with a female vocalist but it was so hard to play a song together. Because timing and feeling were off. But Takashi and I also have such issues. Sometimes we can play not that well together and play disparate.

What makes you write a song?
HK: When my emotions are unleashed a song pops into my mind. In case of Sketchbook I make usually love songs. When I feel something of love a song will come up.

How do you put down and preserve your songs?
HK: I don't make any notes, I just record my songs. These days I use the computer for recording. It's easier. The computer can be connected with audio interface. And I just sing a song by myself to remember the lyrics. So I don't write it down but I sing it and record it. When I send it to the vocalist Takashi I make lyrics notes by email with sound file attachment.

You are really tech savvy...
HK: But Takashi is really low tech actually. He can't use the attachment file. Hotmail. He can't attach sound files he can only open it. He is quiet a character... He lives in Nishin-shi, Aichi prefecture, close to Nagoya, and he is 25. I met him at the high school for the blind. When I was 21 years old I enrolled again to high school. Actually, I quit high school before when I was 16... I was just fed up, didn't wanted to go to school like a 'Futokose'. At the time 'Tokoukyohi' was used to describe school drop outs (denying to go to school). I felt stressed from my friends [peer pressure] ... especially at the high school I didn't believe the teachers... Soon after entering high school with 15 I got sick and was absent for almost a month. So this made me feel bettter and I didn't wanted to go back there and stayed home.

What was your parent's response to that drop out?
HK: Actually I didn't have a father... My mother was so busy at that time and didn't care for such things. Hahaha. She is quiet easygoing. So when I intended to quit high school she agreed.

What did you do instead of school?
HK: I drew pictures with pencil on white paper. Just with pencil. Hmm. And actually I sent some of my artwork to the magazines and three of them were published. I kept the prints in my room but maybe my mother threw them away. She didn't know that it was my published work. Probably after I've moved out from my mother's house she removed them because I couldn't find them anymore. Anyway it was fun. I was just listening to the radio. There was a lot of music exposure for me at that time and I was possibly influenced.

What 's your favorite music?
HK: Actually my favorite musician is Alanis Morissette from Canada. Do you know "Jagged Little Pill"? Ohhhh. So I respect her. I like these eccentric, strong-willed female singers... When I first heard her song ? even though I couldn't understand her lyrics ? I cried. The song was "You Learn". I love that song and I went to her concert twice. Her concerts were really so exciting. So attractive. Besides, I usually listen to Hip Hop and Rock'n'Roll. As far as Sketchbook I made a song, a cord to the vocalist's favor, because Takashi likes ballads and J-Pop. And actually he doesn't have a sense for rhythm. He can't really sing up tempo, he not good at 16 beat. But I am a 16-beat-person. But I keep that in mind when the songs come up to his liking. As for my soul songs, they are quiet different from Sketchbook. I make a lot of Rock'n'Roll songs, and I distort the piano sound with the effector so it sounds like a low- chrome guitar. But it's piano. I think that's innovative. So besides Sketchbook I do different projects.

Do you also do writing?
Hiroki Kubo

The braille editor allows to enter and digitize text before transfering it onto a computer

HK: Actually I wrote a novel. Some of my friends read it but I haven't sent it to a publisher yet. It's not autobiographical, it is imaginary and fiction, more like Murakami Haruki. It's written in Japanese. Some of my song lyrics I try in English. So I have two English songs now. Japanese lyrics can capture people's feelings directly. Sometimes too descriptive words take away people's imagination. But in English you can imagine the meaning more freely. If I write in English Japanese listeners are more liberated and the lyrics are a gateway to imagination. Actually when listening to a song I myself don't really mind the lyrics at first. But when I create lyrics I pay attention to it. Personally I prefer feelings, intuition, and melody to lyrics.

When you write lyrics in Japanese, do you have associations with Kanjis?
HK: I wonder sometimes if I should use Kanji or Hiragana. Because the visual image is gonna be different. Hiragana has a softer, sometimes more spiritual impression. It conveys more the audible quality.

Are you cooking at home?
HK: Yes, basically Japanese food. I cook like you. I use an electric stove ? just in case ? it doesn't have any open fire. It's safe. Hmm. My cooking was popular in San Francisco. I had three other house mates there and of course they could see. But I made the dinner often for them. One of them said: "Hiroki is the best cook here!" They're favorite were Teriyaki Chicken and Kabocha-nimono (pumpkin stew) and Oyako donburi. I like rice dishes.

How do you organize yourself in the kitchen?
HK: Usually I imagine the scenery of cooking. Because before I turned blind I liked to cook. So somehow I was used to it. I can hear when the water is boiling. And if I cook a lot I have intuition what timing is best, right. For frying the Teriyaki chicken or something. So I can tell if it is baked or ready. The way I used the cutting knife changed after I went blind. Now I grab the knife with my thumb on its spine to guide the tool better. Actually I didn't realized it but my ex-girlfriend said that this way of holding is strange and funny. Then I realized that my grip had changed.

What about cleaning your apartment?
HK: I am a better cleaner than my sister... hahaha. After I use the kitchen I clean it up every time.

Why is your luggage so heavy?
Hiroki Kubo

The editor's tactile braille display allows it to read back the entered copy

HK: I brought my VAJO laptop and Braille editor. I use screen reader. It's a mechanic voice, this is 'Yomihird-kun' [male reading voice] and there is Yomiko-chan [female reading voice]. I spend a lot of time in front of the computer. Not only composing, I like to do MSN Messenger to my friends, cause I still have friends are overseas. It's an important connection tool. [navigates with the scrollpad around the Mixi website]. Using the tap key I can move quickly from link to link. Using the control key I can switch between sentences. If I am familiar with a page [like Mixi] I only need to hear only the initial letters I know what's underneath. [English screen reader is audible as Hiroki writes an English text. Each typed letter is read back and pronounced realtime. The question mark triggers the propper intonation when the whole sentence is read back by the screen reader. Shifting the return key triggers a zig-zig- zig-brrr sound like in old Telex writers]. I can also convert Hiragana to Kanji [ensoku no 'en'; 'toi'; and 'i'. Kuuki no 'ku'; 'sora']. It explains the Kanji options with words. English texts can be automatically converted with this software to 99 percent because it's quiet simple, right. But in Japanese Kanjis can be read in different ways depending on their context. That's why sometimes the software cannot convert it correctly. 70 percent only. So in my case I didn't have so much problems with text books at Gaidai.

How did you obtain this computer?
HK: I just went to the Yodobashi camera shop.

At Gaidai University how did you receive your texts?
HK: In the beginning I got text files via email which I converted into Braille with a software. Then I send the data to the Braille Editor here [shows the blue box with the few blank white keys and tactile braille display]. This can work as a paperless text book. Some people used the embossed paper printouts, some just this machine. It can store a lot of data. I can read sentence by sentence. [Yuka comments on the elegant finger movement on the Braille display...]. Oh, nobody so far told me about that...

Do you have a favorite Braille letter?
HK: Hmm, what an interesting question! I heard this for the first time...very nice question... hmm, yes there is one. You can't have a real image with Braille letters, but I like this one [points to a single letter in the Braille display on the editor]: it can be read "FU" in Japanese and "X" in English [raised double dots on top and third row]. I like the letter's shape and its feel. In the English Braillle system it can also be read as "it". Some characters can mean a single word in an English sentence. Because the "x" hardly appears in an English sentence, right. Except for 'Mr. X'. Every alphabet has different acronyms. The English Braille is much more difficult than the Japanese Braille because it has a lot of acronyms like the 'it'. For example 'TCR' means 'together'. That way it's efficient to read. In the alphabet you usually have to read every single letter. [Hiroki demonstrates how he can move single Braille letters freely around the display to correct errors]. This display is just like looking at one text line: it doesn't need a big field to read Braille. One row is enough. I can easily move through an extended text. It's possible to download a text from the Wen and convert it for the Braille editor. I pay 5000 Yen per year to get download access to many books in Braille format.

What is your professional goal?
HK: I want to major in TESOL (Teaching English to Speakers of Other Languages) some day.

How do you know the time of the day?
HK: When I get up in the morning I can hear the birds singing. And the it is a different atmosphere than the night so I can recognize the morning. The morning air seems cleaner than at night. I don't know but when I wake up I can guess what time it is. Even though I can't see outside.

When you have a sleepless night you still know that it is morning?
HK: My body can feel light to some extend. When I forgot to turn off the room light before I fall asleep I feel tired in the morning. So maybe my body somehow received light. It's like I was sleeping under the sunshine. I am somehow light sensitive and can tell when I forgot to turn off the light because my body is tired. Of course I can feel the sunshine on my skin. And if the sky is cloudy I can tell.

Which weather do you like most?
HK: Sunshine because it energizes me. Rain is a little bit troublesome. Because I have to hold my can with my right hand. So if I carry my umbrella both my hands are occupied. But I don't like the raincoat its also troublesome. I like rain in some ways. Not heavy rain. Rain surely slows me down because the rain drop fall upon the umbrella which makes noise so I can't hear clearly the car or some other sounds.

Can you remember any dreams from last night?
Just before I woke up I moved around in the supermarket.

When you dream you see pictures?
HK: Yes. I dream visually. It changed since I am blind since I cannot see faces clearly. Just like monotone pictures. Sometimes I see colors.

Colors still have meaning for you?
HK: Yeah. I dream with colors a lot. I can be like a hero when I dream. I can fly, I feel speed and have vision.

Do you ever have Deja Vues?
HK: Actually not really. Some of my friends talk about it.

When you meet somebody for the first time what's most important.
HK: Voice of course. Everyone has a characteristic voice.

Was connecting in the States different?
HK: It was easier to communicate with each other because they are more direct. In Japan I have to read the other's mind. In English I can be more direct.

Can you feel somebody smiling?
HK: Of course. When I am talking to someone face to face I have much more keys than on the phone. Because the phone has noises and the telephone voice is different from the real one. But face to face I can feel more.

What about smells or scents?
HK: Only women use perfumes. I don't care so much about smell. But every time I encountered the same perfume like my ex-girlfriend wore I remembered her... She was the first girlfriend after I turned blind.

Since you are blind did your relationships to women change?
HK: Not really. My ex-girlfriend was very talkative, she communicated automatically. Since I am blind I have to ask my girlfriend to help me sometimes... to read something, to watch something. So I am more dependent on her. But the girlfriend was depend on me mentally and I cooked for her. That was at the college where we lived on our own.

What kind of TV programs do you watch?
HK: Drama series and comedies. I still like Yoshimoto comedy. It doesn't change a lot but I can laugh a lot, it's funny. I think I can enjoy about 80 percent of the TV program without vision like drama series.

What kind of colors do you like?
HK: Blue, like the sky and ocean. I liked it before I was blind. A female friend of mine whom I met recently said: "my soul's color is blue..." Before I said that I like blue.

What kind of movement do you like?
HK: I love roller coaster. I enjoyed Spiderman attraction at Universal Studio in Osaka. I enjoyed it without seeing the TV screen.

If you would create your own radio program, what you play?
HK: I would record the sound of town. There are a lot of sounds people usually don't notice. But broadcasted on the radio some people might feel different. One of my friends recorded sounds on his trip. He always records sounds. If he listens to the audio again he can remember clearly. It's like taking photos for him. I have some friends who broadcasted over the internet which is more free and everybody can publish.

Do you use Tactile floors?
HK: Around the intersections it works well because it indicated the edge of the road. But at the station there are so many tactile plates that I am getting confused. In San Francisco there were almost none. Nagoya has a lot of Tactiles.

Are you approached by other pedestrians?
HK: Kyoto people seem more open than Nagoya people. It was a bit harder to find help in Nagoya than before. I notice that Kyoto people help me more voluntarily without being asked. Sometimes I get too much attention, especially from older ladies... hahaha. But if someone asked me if I need help I usually accept their offer. Because I might be the first blind person in their life so I should respect that. It's the first impression which counts. If I have time I accept the offer.

Do you have any traffic episodes?
HK: In San Francisco a man helped me while getting off a train and cross a street. Then I noticed that his wife is Japanese. Just after two or three minutes of conversation we connected and she gave me her phone number. After that we became friends even though he was 70 years old. Their family invited me to Thanksgiving Day.

Did you ever had an accident?
HK: I have an interesting story. Actually my Mobility instructor in San Francisco advised me to get a longer cane. So I obtained one in the US which was two inches longer than my Japanese. She said it's more safe: if the cane is longer I have more time before I hit something, therefore I have more "reaction time". In San Francisco I had no problems. But soon after I returned to Nagoya my cane has been hit by a bicycle because the Japanese sidewalk is narrower and the American cane was longer. The cane was brocken and the cyclist was sorry about it. Since I was walking with my cane she maybe felt like she hit a person's eyes. She went to the supermarket to get some tape and fix it up a little bit so I could return home. She tried to leave her name and contact but I didn't care because only my American memory was broken... I realized that it was just too long.

[On the way to the bus stop]
HK: I can feel directions through the sunshine. When I lose my way sunshine can help me orient myself. Are we on a bridge? 'Ogawa no Seseragi' means soft sound of a small river. Nagoya's traffic light sound signals from North to South goes "pyo- pyo", from East to West its "kako-kako". I don't know, but I am good at finding where the bus stops is... so the first time I was on a date with my ex-girlfriend she was surprised because I found the bus stop before her...

Hiroki Kubo
is co-founder and member of the band Sketchbook where music is considered like an imaginary drawing of daily life.